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Sunday, June 2, 2013

CAREERS IN CRIME-AN APPLICANT'S GUIDE TO CON MAN 101


In the current Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM), the American Psychiatric Association (APA) defines Histrionic Personality Disorder as a "pervasive pattern of excessive emotionality and attention seeking, beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts."  According to the APA, this disorder is diagnosed by identifying at least five of the following behaviors:
 

-Is uncomfortable in situations in which he or she is not the center of attention

-Interaction with others is often characterized by inappropriate sexually seductive or provocative behavior

-Displays rapidly shifting and shallow expression of emotions

-Consistently uses physical appearance to draw attention to self

-Has a style of speech that is excessively impressionistic and lacking in detail

-Shows self-dramatization, theatricality, and exaggerated expression of emotion

-Considers relationships to be more intimate than they actually are

Ding, ding, ding! Looks like we've got a match!

For example, let's look at a recent Facebook post from your girl Miss Fortune's favorite fugitive and soon-to-be convicted felon, David Lee Hunter. 

Dazzling hometown friends with tales of his high life has become too old-school for Hunter, so he's troweling on the name-dropping, star-f***er bullshit like Thin-Set on the back of a bathroom tile.

Last Thursday, May 30th, Hunter claimed that Tom Petty "watched me drink alchohol [sic]" before he left to go meet his "girl MIA [sic]": 


You know there's a plot twist coming, right? As transparent as any of the best "Lifetime" movies Miss Fortune loves (especially "Till Murder do us Part: The Betty Broderick Story"), there's a bend in the road.

Notice how Hunter says Petty was just sitting in a club with "his hair up in a ball cap", minding his own business, watching El Davo the Hunted drink "alchohol"?

That's a little tough to do when you're still in New York City for a few days of downtime after playing five sold-out shows at the Beacon Theatre. And his "girl MIA"?  Like Hunter's conscience, she's not in his mother's basement either.       Free fallin', anyone?





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