}

Saturday, April 12, 2014

SOUVENIR HUNTERS INVADE BATTLE CREEK'S TORCHED ON DECK SPORTS BAR & GRILL: Police Reinstate Surveillance After Series Of Attempted Booze Burglaries

HAS THE "CROOKED CHIROPRACTOR" ROBERT BUCKHANNON MISSED A LUCRATIVE—AND LEGITIMATE BUSINESS OPPORTUNITY?

DR. ROB'S FIREWATER "VANITY VODKA" BRAND COULD BE KEY TO BUCKHANNON'S COMEBACK!
 
The Battle Creek Enquirer reported this week that Battle Creek police and an insurance company had begun surveillance of the former On Deck Sports Bar and Grill at 225 W. Michigan Ave. after another burglary was reported. Officers said they discovered Wednesday that someone had entered the building, apparently looking for alcohol. (Contrary to earlier reports, police did not locate any chiropractor or cheerleader footprints.)

Police reported the break-in about 9:10 a.m. and said they found someone had collected several bottles of liquor and left them on the bar. It was the third burglary in a week at the scene of the fire which destroyed the business and four-story building on Dec. 30. 

Detective Scott Silverman reported the first illegal entry at 8:46 a.m. Friday, April 4, when he went to the building to meet with an insurance adjuster and found a padlock on a metal door had been pried open. He said the break-in had occurred sometime after 3 p.m. Thursday, April 3.

Officers didn’t find anyone inside but found a second lock had been removed from a door into the kitchen. Officers found several open beer bottles on the first and second floors and said someone had used some clothing they found to make a small bed in a back office. Beer bottles also were found there.


Police also found several liquor bottles inside a third-floor temporary enclosure constructed during the investigation. Police had built small plastic tents to heat areas and melt snow and ice as they searched the building for clues about the fire.

Officers found some clothes had been made into a small bed there; they believed someone had been drinking in that area, as well.

Police said at least eight bottles of liquor and several bottles of beer were moved.

New plywood was installed and a metal door that was damaged by the fire and cold weather was secured on April 4.

But on Saturday, Silverman, who is leading the investigation into the fire, reported finding that someone had again entered the building.

Police believe an intruder climbed a downspout and entered the building through a partially collapsed roof and then gained access to a walk-in cooler. From there the intruders were able to enter the bar.

Investigators are trying to determine the cause of the fire and police said they will continue to watch the building until the probe is complete.

But Miss Fortune believes that the "crooked chiropractor" (now rumored to have fled Kelly's arms and gone back to Las Vegas...and his wife Marlena) may have missed a significant new business opportunity, and one that might make him a legitimate millionaire.

In a word, booze!

VANITY VODKA, SHAKEN AND STIRRED

Diddy did it, and so did retired porn star Ron Jeremy and goth rocker Marilyn Mansonthey launched their own brands of booze.

As an experienced marketing and advertising professional (honed by ten years in New York City), Miss Fortune knows that celebrity builds brand awareness.

It's clear as vodka that there's a thirst for booze in Battle Creek, and Miss Fortune's proposing that Buckhannon launch his own vanity vodka under the name "Dr. Rob's Firewater".

Leveraging his notoriety, Buckhannon's vodka line would launch with a memorable name and capture the imagination of liquor consumers from Battle Creek to Manistee.

How about a Dirty Rob Martini, featuring a pair of Blue Cheese-Almond stuffed olives?

Bottoms up!

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